The girl grew just a few years older and was to have a huge change in her life. A baby brother who was eight years’ younger arrived. She was so excited to be able to be mama’s helper with this baby. It was kind of like her dolls but it wiggled and cried a whole lot more. It wasn’t as fun as the dolls who didn’t cry and sat so quiet while their diaper and clothes were changed. Being eight years older and such a good helper the dolls were pushed aside and the real live baby brother was there to take care of because the mom was helping the dad harvest. The baby was born right at the beginning of harvest of a small family farm.
Being such a good big sister and taking great care of this new living doll was easy and convenient for the mom. Only being a call away on the CB radio if anything too difficult would arise. The big sister wanting to show her mom she could do it, took very good care of her baby brother and her other brother who was close to three years younger than her. But, sometimes it got very difficult and scary to know what to do when he cried endlessly. Changing his diaper, feeding him, walking around the house; nothing seemed to stop the crying. Calling her mom with fear in her voice of, what should I do, he won’t quit crying. The mom would give her some ideas and she would give them a try. Sometimes they worked, sometimes not. The young girl just wanted out of this new responsibility and wanted to go back to her playhouse and dolls.
Teenage girls expected to babysit, not this girl, she had her fill of two younger brothers, one a baby who always cried and never would be satisfied. It scared her so much she never wanted to babysit. That could be for other girls who seemed to know what to do with crying babies. No babysitting for her.
High school graduation and college bound, she had a dream from junior high to be a successful business woman in a male dominated corporate world. Yet, in the era of ‘women hear me roar’ and ‘equal pay for women’ she was bound and determined to show everyone she could be amongst the toughest of men.
Marriage to her longtime boyfriend in the summer of her senior year of college. The horizon looked promising of graduating from college and sealing a first time job in the business community. Working in the business world for at least 3-5 years would give her enough experience under her belt to apply for a position that had more responsibility. Yet, this husband of hers had ideas of having children. She wanted NOTHING to do with children. The years of her past were filled with terrible experiences with crying babies and brothers who were always getting into mischief. The ‘kid thing’ was for the ‘other woman’ who seemed to have more of that motherly insistent, not this woman.
Guilt and prodding of the need to have children was a continual topic of conversation with the husband. Almost daily. Tired and getting wore down she gave in to the battle to try to have children. Thinking it would happen right away and the process could get along and on its way. One child would be good; this would be enough to handle with a corporate career.
Six years later hopelessness set in, no blue line on the pregnancy stick. Each month became torture to think that she now would not be able to have children. Was something wrong with her? Adoption became the next topic of discussion and both her and her husband were not quite convinced. The time was ticking with both of them climbing in age.
Now that she was sold on the idea of having a child, nothing was happening........